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So, this isn’t my “creative” blog post for the week, but I thought it would be fun to do, seeing as I am kind of really into film and want to see how many I can get right. Obviously it’s a waste of time and space but hey, leave me alone. I’ve not done it before (I would never watch the Oscars, how dull) but I always check to find out the winners (and get sad when all the wrong people – essentially, all the famous good-looking people – get all the nominations). Anyway, here goes, starting with the more boring and getting more interesting (ish):

Best original screenplay

  • American Hustle
  • Blue Jasmine
  • Dallas Buyers Club
  • Her
  • Nebraska

I think the award will go to American Hustle, though it really should go to Her or Nebraska.

Best adapted screenplay

  • 12 Years a Slave
  • Before Midnight
  • Captain Phillips
  • Philomena
  • The Wolf of Wall Street

These are all very good. Before Midnight wasn’t nominated for Best Picture, unlike all the others, which means it isn’t going to win. Neither will Captain Phillips or Philomena (though I’d love Steve Coogan to have an Oscar), and I feel Wolf is too outrageous for the old Academy, so I’m going to go 12 Years a Slave.

Best supporting actor

  • Barkhad Abdi, Captain Phillips
  • Bradley Cooper, American Hustle
  • Michael Fassbender, 12 Years a Slave
  • Jonah Hill, The Wolf of Wall Street
  • Jared Leto, Dallas Buyers Club

I’m not convinced that Barkhad Abdi is even 100 to 1 on this, and I’m not convinced Jonah Hill should have got a nomination (I way preferred Daniel Brühl in Rush). It’s a toss-up between Cooper, Fassbender and Leto, but because of the showiness (and impressiveness) of Jared Leto’s performance, I’d say it’s got to be him.

Best supporting actress

  • Sally Hawkins, Blue Jasmine
  • Jennifer Lawrence, American Hustle
  • Lupito N’yongo, 12 Years a Slave
  • Julia Roberts, August: Osage County
  • June Squibb, Nebraska

I would love for Sally Hawkins to win, mainly because I’m British and she’s brilliant, but I don’t think that’s ever going to happen – nor is June Squibb. It’s basically either Jennifer Lawrence or Lupita N’yongo, and Jennifer Lawrence got the Golden Globe. But I really didn’t rate Jennifer Lawrence all that much in this film, she was far too young for her character, besides which – this would be her second Oscar, and she is too young for that too! So I’m going to say the Academy will give it to Lupita N’yongo.

Best animated feature

  • The Croods
  • Despicable Me 2
  • Ernest and Celestine
  • Frozen
  • The Wind Rises

I’m not going to pretend I’ve seen all these, and neither will the Academy voters, although well done them for putting some interesting choices in. Frozen to win though.

Best director

  • Alfonso Cuaron, Gravity
  • Steve McQueen, 12 Years a Slave
  • Alexander Payne, Nebraska
  • David O. Russell, American Hustle
  • Martin Scorcese, The Wolf of Wall Street

Can you believe Martin Scorcese only has one Oscar? I can’t, but hey, he isn’t going to win again for this. It’s really between Cuaron and McQueen, who would both, in my opinion, be equally worthy winners – one for amazing technological wizardry, and one for brilliant, tortuous drama. In the end though, I’m going to have to go with my heart and bet on Steve McQueen.

Best actor

  • Christian Bale, American Hustle
  • Bruce Dern, Nebraska
  • Leonardo DiCaprio, The Wolf of Wall Street
  • Chiwetel Ejiofor, 12 Years a Slave
  • Matthew McConaughey, Dallas Buyers Club

I’d be happy for any of these to win, with the exception of Christian Bale, who is still good but not the standard of the others (his place really really should belong to Tom Hanks, or Robert Redford, or Oscar Isaac, or Joaquin Phoenix). Bruce Dern might get the award just for being a long-time great actor, but then really DiCaprio ought to get it, as he has been nominated more times before, and gives a riveting performance. In my opinion, anyway, Ejiofor gives the best performance, honest but painful, yet this award is Matthew McConaughey’s to lose. He puts in a great show, lost a load of weight for the part, and is experiencing a resurgence in his career – all things the Academy love. Not bad for the bloke from Failure to Launch.

Best actress

  • Amy Adams, American Hustle
  • Cate Blanchett, Blue Jasmine
  • Sandra Bullock, Gravity
  • Judi Dench, Philomena
  • Meryl Streep, August: Osage County

An easy choice really: Emma Thompson to win. Oh wait! No, even if she had been nominated (which she should have been), then Cate Blanchett would win it, as she will on the night. Only Amy Adams might surprise her, now on her fifth nomination and counting, but I think Blanchett has it in the bag.

Best film

  • 12 Years a Slave
  • American Hustle
  • Captain Phillips
  • Dallas Buyers Club
  • Gravity
  • Her
  • Nebraska
  • Philomena
  • The Wolf of Wall Street

I like this list a lot more than I like many of the acting nominees (seriously, Jonah Hill and Christian Bale’s inclusions seem ludicrous), but I do feel that as there were ten spots available and only nine films were chosen they have missed out. No love for Saving Mr Banks? All is Lost? Inside Llewyn Davis? They were all great films. Anyway, for the big one it can go one of three ways: 12 Years, Hustle or Gravity. I think American Hustle will be the one that misses out here, whilst Gravity is assured wins in the technical categories, whereas I think the epic 12 Years a Slave might bag the most important statuette.

Well, anyway, that’s that. My take on the Oscars this year. If I get at least three happy I’ll be right. And as I’ve voted for Cate Blanchett then I’m guaranteed at least one, so that’s just two more to go!

Time to stop spamming the Internet with my pointless guesses,

Rhino

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